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The most perplexing and important aspect
of being a visual artist for me is the question of what to paint. I react
to paintings largely on an emotional, instinctive level which has much
more to do with the subconscious than any specific rational or cognitive
thought. Unlike literature or music, a painting can be experienced all
at once so the initial response is almost involuntary and subliminal.
This perception is difficult to articulate for it manifests itself in
an intangible "feeling" that does not easily translate into
words. I want to be enthralled and moved by art as well as involved and
interested. These desires are essential for inspiring and sustaining the
creation of a work and make my choice of subject matter especially critical.
Human presence in a painting has untold potential to provoke strong emotional
responses for nothing else is nearly so compelling as ourselves. Virtually
all pictures of people function as mirrors to some degree, but in order
to see through myself and beyond I invariably look to women. Their eternal
ties to the earth's regenerative powers and its unwavering cycles are
indisputably profound, particularly as seen from the vast distance of
my male vantage point. So much so that women's mysterious blend of ancient
spirituality, temperate nature, innate wisdom, and absorbing sexuality
is my irresistable and primary theme.
As solid as this general conclusion is to me, fertile ideas for individual
paintings can be extremely difficult to come by, which makes them all
the more rare and valuable when they do appear - sometimes in a flash,
but more often lured from the depths with a mix of visual stimulation,
free association, and focused concentration. The actual process of execution
with its myriad of technical problems is quite painstaking, but if the
original notion is worthy there are always visual solutions. Matters of
color and compostion are becoming increasingly obvious to me; as clear
as math or grammar but quite beyond logic or even my direct control.
As I fluctuate between confidence and anxiety while painting, it is this
enigmatic yet reliable sense of certainty about what looks right and/or
beautiful that makes the thousands of sequential decisions necessary to
see a work through to fruition. Regardless of planning or expectations,
it's impossible to accurately envision a picture prior to completion.
Consequently, hopeful anticipation shifts to full-fledged excitement as
I progress and often I'm as stunned by the final cumulative effect as
anyone.
Martin A. Maddox, 1991
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